Power of the Past

   Growing up as a child in mid-Texas I didn’t know about racism, at least not until my teens. We had always lived with blacks, Hispanics, and whites in our neighborhoods and schools. We kids were friends regardless of color.

   In our junior high (we had that for grades 7 to 9) things changed. A local school was closed. The students were to be bused to our school. Most of these new students were black. Not a problem.
Dystopos flickr.com
   We all had to adjust, them to this new school and all of us to a new set of kids. As I said we were already an interracial school, so that was an advantage. But I remember some of the new students were unhappy with the new arrangement. Some had negative attitudes, some were trouble-makers, inciting arguments. Now I see they were just testing us, in their attempts to adjust.

   I had always been a shy withdrawn child. Only until well past my teens did I get out of that shell somewhat. But back then I kept to myself and was passive. I didn’t understand the behavior and attitudes of the new students. What was the problem? Apparently the teachers took notice and some even addressed it straight up in classes. Even in classes having nothing to do with racial tensions, like English class.

   My English teacher helped start a conversation. I do not remember the specifics unfortunately. But I remember learning valuable lessons. The new students started talking about their expectations of resentment from us. They knew what it was like to have others be prejudice against them. There was some discussion of history about slavery.

   For the life of me, I don’t remember schools ever teaching us the truth about slavery. Or about how Indigenous People/Native Americans, had their lands and their lives violently taken away from them. It was always one-sided, that they killed whites.

   Oh sure, we were taught that Christopher Columbus discovered America in 1492. Only that was a lie. He never set foot in North America. He was in South and Central America and the islands in the Caribbean. There he slaughtered natives, and enslaved them. All in his quest for riches and to find more land to conquer. (1)

   Now let me say I am glad to be an American. I believe in the constitution and our values. But the truth is necessary in order to keep us from repeating mistakes. We were not always, maybe never, entirely a good, respectful nation.

   We didn’t start out this country with human rights in mind. Those who manipulated Native Americans out of treaties, and worse, killed them, justified it by pretending these people weren’t equal to themselves.(2) 

   And thus the behaviors continued, adding more black people as slaves.

   Over and over the white conquerors were feeding into the early consciousness of this nation that some humans were sub-beings. Generation after generation taught the mindset of putting oneself above others. At any cost. Even the cost of a civil war.

   And even after that war, though slaves were set “free,” many whites did not let go of their own prejudices and beliefs. They kept a grip on them. Fighting simply continued in other areas: socio-economic, education, ownership of land, voting. And in lack of law and order, such as lynchings.
Ted Eytan  flickr.com

   Some people today question the validity of a black person bringing up the issues of past treatment. They say there is no slavery, no discrimination now, why act like a victim? But clearly there is an issue. Discrimination is still in the mindset of people today.

   We are raised to believe certain things. We have not been taught to experience equality, because we have not been taught the truth about our nation’s history. Without knowing the truth and confronting the truth, we are not a nation of equality, nor one allowing others to seek “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” for all.

   What about the pursuit of life, liberty and happiness for the Native Americans/Indigenous People? What about the blacks forced into slavery just a few generations ago? Or even the American Japanese who were forced into internment camps between 1942-1946?

   This sounds so familiar. Because this continues to be the behaviors even today. Politically, industrially, financially. The top 2 percent owning and running America, with their pursuit of power, money, and land, with many others pushing their way to be just like that, acting as if they are better than others. Treating people as if they don’t matter. As if others are sub-human.

   It is a long, difficult struggle for everyday Americans to fight for America’s values. Too many take it for granted I think. Too many are trapped in their own mindset, not searching, not reaching for the truth.

   Read. Learn. Grow. Don’t stay stuck. Teach.

   Those teachers in my junior high school (so many years ago) noticed a disruption in their classrooms, so they opened up a conversation, and allowed us kids to express and question life as it was happening. Then we learned the truth about our history. Taking the past and the present, we could move forward to change for the better. We must keep teaching.

   I’ve never forgotten the power of a teacher.

 Theresa M




sources:

(1) theguardian.com “In 1492 Columbus sailed…” by Sara Galo 10/13/14
(2) allabouthistory.org/native-american-history and
      britanica.com/topic/Native-American/Native-American-history
(3) britannica.com/event/Japanese-American-internment

In Her Mother's Eyes


She carries these images of the past
in pictures of black and white and gray
Of times belonging to the past--not of today.

She sees a part of herself in her mother’s eyes,
And longs for a place to dwell
in comfort, in safety, in warmth,
away from today’s hell.

Images frozen in a time that was
really no safer than now.
Pain, hardship, sorrow was there
and is in the here-and-now.

She carries these images of the past
in pictures of black and white and gray,
and in faded memories
that forget and forgive the pain
of times belonging to the past--not in vain,

but in longing--in a longing to be free….
Theresa M


Happy Birthday, mom

In Between Life and Death

Science comes up with new ways to extend our lives. Seems every year there’s a new pill, a new method or procedure, another study finds the Fountain of Youth!  Hooray!

   All I know is I don’t want to keep living on and on and on. Don’t get me wrong - I’m not suicidal or fatalistic. This is merely my opinion and view. Since I believe in the afterlife with God, I look forward to my heavenly world. Don’t believe in it? Fine, suit yourself.


   So life goes on, for some people it gets worse with disease, financial problems, loss, grief, maybe inability to care for self. For others life is pretty good - travel, family, work, time for hobbies, etc. And there are the “in-betweens” - life’s okay, not too great, but not too bad, “can’t complain!”

   I was thinking, joking really the other day with one of my sisters about not wanting to live so long, so I would need to stop taking care of myself. Maybe we could start smoking, or drinking. Yeah, hang outside on the patio, smoking a few cigars, toasting drinks, singing beer songs!

   Even more, smoke, drink and drive a car at the same time! Add texting too! And fried chicken! Just increase those chances of death. Long-term, incremental harm or short-term, it reduces chances to live.

   I know this sounds absurd - it is! I’m just making a point that we make both life-enhancing and death-provoking choices every day. Every day we support life or death for ourselves, and for many others whom we may not realize are affected.

   Smoking, drinking alcohol, texting while driving, diet choices are obvious. Not so obvious are stances we take on issues. I’m not here to advocate for any or tell you what you shouldn’t choose (for that refer to Twitter! lol) 

   Sometimes there may actually be no wrong or right answer. That’s just the way life is. We are all here: we teach and we learn; we help and we hurt; we live and we die.

   But let me say if you do take a stance on an issue, please think it through. It’s okay to say you’re not sure. Maybe you have no life experience with the issue to help influence you.

   But know that others are influenced by what you do. Let me just list some issues, you study your own reactions: gun laws, abortion, minorities, unemployment, immigration. Should I go on? Notice the intensity of any particular feelings? Powerful, huh? Ponder upon those feelings carefully.

   So I’m glad I believe in God, and the afterlife. I feel a certain hope within. I feel responsible too for how I act here throughout this life that I live. Probably closer to death now than to birth. It’s okay. I know I will have left a mark on the world for another generation. We all do.         Theresa M. 

     PS - No I don’t smoke, drink or text-drive. As for fried chicken - yummmm!




Fire Seed

Only a spark is what I need to begin--
Just like a seed so tiny finds its way into the earth
nestling into place--with darkness to embrace
its entire self.

Yet even in darkness and dirt nurturing can come.
When it does a power transforms this seed
into a new creation; a similar relation.

I see myself being like a seed transformed--
But although darkness is all around
it is I who brings the light to show the way--
on chilly days I warm the hearth and cook the food
to nourish those who nourished me.

Yet those who ignite me--taking me from a spark
to a flame,
to a blazing fiery frenzy of power and light--
May not always be those capable of handling my purpose
so right.
Within my own being I am neither right nor wrong--
intend no harm--
powerlessness is among my greatest strengths.

But I must yield to those who nurtured me from a spark
and use me to start
infernos raging and rushing to harm, hurt, or maim--
borne of insane ideas to bring upon themselves a means
to inflame
their weak egos--stealing my power, claiming as their own.

And thus so many talk as if I am such an evil destroyer
of forests and hillsides, or homes and buildings,
people and their materials;
or little white sticks used patiently to suck away
their breathing
leaving them coughing and wheezing,
even as they compulsively relight with the sparks
they always use to sustain this flame;
laying blame on anyone or anything else.

The nurturer continuously becomes the destroyer;
a cycle of nurturing a spark into a living fire.
Losing all control as they aspire to empower
themselves of an element
meant to be respected and used wisely.

Though they steal my power, they cannot steal
my wisdom.
Thus I extinguish my flames on down to embers,
leaving only ashes to remember--
as a small budding flower--for what it’s worth--
struggles to seek more nurturance
among the cold, dark earth.

    Theresa M

We pray for the victims of the raging fires: people, animals, nature.
May your spirits be reborn into the Light.